Kate Emily Byram

Oh hey!  I have a daughter!  Kate was born on 1/16/13 at 12:24 a.m.  She weighed 7 lbs 15 oz and was 20 1/2 inches long.

As I sit to write her birth story, I want to both laugh and cry. Some of it was pretty awful, but overall it was so special and amazing and I will treasure it forever because it is the experience that brought me my baby Kate.

The morning of Tuesday, 1/15 I had a regular doctor's appointment. I was 39 1/2 weeks and was actually kinda surprised that I was still pregnant. I had already had a few looooong nights of timing contractions over the past few weeks.  Some of these contractions had even started to hurt, but then they eventually went away by morning.  Kind of frustrating.  Anyway, I was dilated to a 3 1/2.  The doctor stripped my membranes and told me that he was pretty sure I'd be going into labor within the next few days. I wasn't so sure since Kate seemed super comfortable in there, but I hoped he was right. 

Well, me and Matthew had a pretty regular day. We went for a walk, went to Target, and played at home. I had a couple contractions, but nothing unusual. After Michael got home we ate dinner and then all hung out until we put Matthew to bed around 8. I noticed that I had a couple more contractions but still didn't think much of it. I took a shower and just kinda hung out around the house with Michael. Well, the contractions got a little more frequent so I decided to start timing them. Michael got excited and assumed I was in labor but I laughed at him and told him that I was just doing this as a precaution and that it probably meant nothing. Well, after 20 minutes of this I decided to get things ready for the hospital... You know, just in case. ;-) Michael got even more excited but I told him to knock it off because I didn't want us to get our hopes up.  After all, this was not the first time I was timing contractions.  After another half hour, Michael suggested loading our stuff in the car - once again, "just in case."  It took me a couple more contractions to agree to this because my contractions actually weren't at all regular. However, they were getting more uncomfortable so eventually I agreed. Then, finally, I had a contraction that made me stop dead in my tracks. It was the worst one I'd had so far this pregnancy.  When I looked up and saw Michael's face, I knew that he firmly believed that Kate was on her way. I was of course in denial still, but didn't put up too much of a fight when Michael said that we should get Matthew up and drive in the general direction of the house of our friends who were going to watch Matthew. Well, I'm very thankful for a husband that made all this happen because by the time we reached our friends house, I was definitely in a LOT of pain and ready to admit that we should definitely be headed to the hospital.  We got there about 20 minutes later and even though I'd already filled out all my paperwork, I still had to sit and answer a bunch of questions.  At this point, I was still in control despite being in a lot of pain.  The lady would wait patiently for me to breathe through a contraction before continuing on with the questions.  I was pretty proud of myself for handling the pain relatively well thus far.  Then, it was off to triage.  By now, it was after 11 p.m.

Now, my hospital in Nashville where I delivered Matthew didn't have triage, so I got to skip that step last time.  And you know what?  As common as triage is, I DO NOT LIKE IT!  Seriously - I get that it's necessary for a lot of women, but I really just hate it.  After I got in a gown and got hooked up, the triage nurse checked me and announced that I was at a 3 1/2.  Um, WHAT???  I was at a 3 1/2 at my doctor's appointment earlier that day!  I was sure that she was stupid and should be fired immediately.  She then told me that she was going to wait about an hour to see if I progressed and then, if I progressed at least a full cm, I'd be admitted.  I felt a sense of panic.  There was no way I was only a 3 1/2!  I had done this before and I KNEW I was in labor, and I was already in SO much pain.  An hour seemed like an absolute eternity.  When she left I looked at Michael and vented my heart out.  My plan was to get admitted immediately and get my epidural 2 seconds later.  (A girl can dream, right?)  Agh.  Michael was wonderful and tried to keep me distracted while also being super supportive.  A few minutes later the nurse came back and told me to turn on my side in order to get better readings on my contractions and Kate's heartbeat.  This is when things took a major turn for the worse.  After turning on my side, the contractions went from really bad to absolutely horrific.  I felt myself starting to lose control but really wanted to stay calm.  I was still in triage for goodness sake! I tried breathing really well and going to "happy places."  That didn't help at all.  There are no happy places when you're in that much pain - at least not for me.  I started yelling out during contractions and squeezing Michael's hand to death.  I heard myself telling Michael that I didn't want to do this anymore - I wanted to just go home and have the pain go away.  Well, the nurse heard me yelling and came back.  Even though it had only been about 15 minutes since I entered triage, she checked me again, and to my horror, told me that I was at a 3 1/2.  I wanted to kill her.  I was sure that she had no idea what she was doing and was not qualified to be a nurse.  I told her I wanted an epidural right then, (ha) and she told me that an epidural couldn't happen until I'd received fluids, had labs done, and oh yeah, BEEN ADMITTED!  When she walked away again, I really, really started to panic.  I knew panicking wouldn't do a dang thing to help me, but I couldn't help myself.  I started yelling louder during contractions and started begging Michael to knock me out.  (I know. Not my proudest moment).  :-)  Michael left to go talk to the nurse to see if there was something else that could be done (seriously, I love him) and the nurse told him that she was already trying to get me a prescription for morphine.  This didn't make me feel any better.  I just wanted my dang epidural.  After about 2 or 3 more contractions I think it became apparent to the nurse that I wasn't some silly girl who had no idea what labor pain was really like because she came back in to talk to me.  Before she could even say anything, my water broke.  I told her what was happening and she checked me again.  Just like that, I was almost a 6.  I had gone from a 3 1/2 to a 6 in 5 minutes!  I was horrified but just a little happy at the same time because I could finally finally finally get out of triage!!!!!  She got on the phone immediately and I heard her say something about fast progression and that I would need to be wheeled on the bed to Labor and Delivery.  I reminded her for the 1000th time that I wanted an epidural.  :-)  She immediately stuck me to get my fluids going and then everything started to become a blur. 

The pain was excruciating and any embarrassment I could have had over my behavior went out the window. Some nurses came in and I was being wheeled very fast down halls and I was screaming. Not yelling. Screaming. I remember a nurse asking someone who the anesthesiologist was and someone answered, "Dr. Lee."  The nurse mumbled something about that being a bummer because he was very picky about getting lab results back before getting an epidural. Michael told me later that he hoped I didn't hear that but I did and I felt so hopeless and horrified. I remember being wheeled into a room and the nurses telling me to slide from the bed I was on to the bed I would deliver on. They might as well have asked me to climb Mt. Everest.  (But eventually I managed).  :-)  I remember wondering why there seemed to be no relief between contractions. I heard a nurse make a call and tell the doctor on the other line that she knew he had a C-section to do right then but that he needed to come here first because someone was progressing extremely fast and would be delivering any minute.  Then I heard a man's voice in the room, and someone called him Dr. Lee.  Dr. Lee?  That was the anesthesiologist!  I looked over to him and begged, "Can I have an epidural right now please please please please please?????'" He laughed and said, "How can I refuse that?"  He then asked me if I'd promise to sign all the paperwork for the epidural as soon as I was able.  I told him I'd sign whatever he wanted me to sign, whenever he wanted me to sign it.  I was seriously willing to sign my life away if that's what it took.  He quickly went to work setting things up for my epidural, bless his heart.  

I was checked again.  I was a 9+.  I felt the need to push but didn't want to tell anyone because I was afraid that they'd then tell me I couldn't have my epidural. I was still screaming through every contraction. The desire to push took over and I couldn't help myself from pushing. A nurse saw me doing so and told me to try as hard as I could  to breathe quickly through those urges to push and to not push. Uh, anyone who has delivered naturally knows that that's totally impossible. I tried anyway to do what she said.  Then Dr. Lee told me to sit up for my epidural. I grabbed onto Michael and screamed (in his ear- oops) through my contractions as Dr. Lee did my epidural. Looking back, he must be good because he sure placed it fast. At the time, it felt like a million years. I wanted to feel numb immediately but my next contraction was just as awful. I yelled that I was going to throw up and someone handed Michael a barf bag to hold for me. I was checked. 10 cm!!! By now the doctor who would deliver Kate was there and he and the nurses were rushing to get everything ready for delivery. It was ready within a minute and the doctor said it would only be a push or two until my baby would be born. I hoped that my epidural was kicking in. The urge to push came 2 seconds later and I pushed.  Michael and the nurses were coaching me and cheering me on. I remember Michael saying, "She's almost here... You're doing great... She's almost here...." One more push, major burning, and then out she came! Relief! Kate was put on my chest. I cried. It was I over and I got the most amazing prize. A beautiful daughter! She didn't cry immediately but after some encouragement and suction she let out her first cries. It was surreal and I was so, so happy. I looked at Michael and said, "She looks just like Matthew," and he laughed and agreed. We enjoyed our first few minutes with Kate and loved taking in all her features. Life was so so good.

There are a few moments in my life that are permanently etched into my brain in perfect detail.  Among these moments include walking into my first class at BYU, kneeling across the altar from Michael, and holding both of my babies for the first time.  At the risk of sounding extremely cheesy, I am so blessed and thankful for both of my beautiful and healthy children.  Family really is the best thing isn't it?

After everything calmed down (and I finally signed all my hospital admittance paperwork, haha) I couldn't sleep well. I think I was on a baby high. :-)  I was also excited to see Matthew and have him meet his sister. He came later that day when my mom got into town and brought him. It went pretty much how I thought-  he wasn't that interested in Kate and pretty much just wanted to open cupboards and run around the room. ;-) I loved it anyway. He then went home with my mom while me and Michael stayed at the hospital. We went home the morning if the 17th. I was anxious to get home and get started on our life there. My mom stayed 5 days and I'm pretty sure Matthew has never had so much fun. We were all pretty depressed when she left. Luckily my mother-in-law came to the rescue and Matthew loves playing with her as well. Don't ask me how I'm feeling about next week when I'll be on my own with Matthew and Kate. It gives me anxiety.  :-/  :-)

Anyway, recovery has been awesome ( WAY better this time) and Kate fits in perfectly. She is so cute and loves to cuddle. She has the most girly squeal and cry and it makes us laugh.  She's kind of a drama queen about getting her diaper changed.  She really, really, really hates it.  She doesn't sleep great but that's no surprise- she's a newborn after all.  :-)  She's hungry all the time and very strong. As hard and tiring as these days are, (and they sure are hard and tiring!) I'm loving and cherishing her newborn-hood as much as I can.  As I've already learned, before I can blink I'll be watching her dig into her first birthday cake.

And now some pictures!

first family photo

 going home!

 With Grandma.  Thanks Mom for helping and giving Matthew so much TLC when I couldn't.

 first bath

 Yes, he's smitten.  If you want to get him worked up and upset, talk about Kate getting married.  :-)

And Matthew?  Most of the time he's pretty disinterested.  However, when he is interested, he's pretty dang good with her.  I have to watch him like a hawk because he "shares" with her by trying to shove toys in her face, but he is learning to be gentle.  This is him tickling her feet.  :-)  I love these two.

While We Wait

I promised myself that I wouldn't get too impatient while waiting for Baby Girl to make her appearance, even if she decided to be fashionably late.  So far, I think I've been doing pretty well, but it does get harder as that due date draws closer and closer.  (One more week!  Ahh!)  While this pregnancy has mostly seemed to fly by, it has started passing just a little slower these last few weeks.  So, to help pass the time while also enjoying every moment, we've found lots to keep us busy around here.

Me and Matthew go on walks every day, and we almost always end up at the park.  On weekends, Michael joins us.

Lots of family date nights!  Sometimes we go get treats, sometimes we walk around stores, and sometimes we run errands.  (I guess errands don't really count as date nights though).  :-)

Shopping with both Michael and Matthew is always interesting.  I'm kinda surprised we haven't been kicked out of a few stores by now.  ;-)  At least Matthew is always entertained!

Lots of fun and relaxing baths!  Well, more fun for Matthew, and more relaxing for me.

I have a feeling that I won't be getting out during the day nearly as much once I have two little ones to tote around, so I take Matthew out quite a few times every day.  Today, we hit up Barnes and Noble so I could read Matthew the cute little Valentine's Day books.  (Oh how I will miss this when, all too soon, Matthew will no longer want to read "cute little Valentine's Day books.")

And we are staying as active as possible!  (Not like I have much of a choice with Matthew around).  ;-)  It's always nice though to be able to relax a little more in the evenings when Michael comes home since he can take over the role of being crazy with Matthew for a bit.... even if I occasionally find them doing things like jumping on the bed and messing it all up.  ;-)

And I've done a little crafting!  Mostly baby girl stuff.  Here's a hair bow holder I made for her - definitely simple, but kinda cute!

It's funny how different every pregnancy really is.  With Matthew I had maybe 10 total Braxton Hicks contractions during my pregnancy, (none of which were even remotely uncomfortable) and was barely dilated at all when I went into labor 10 days early.  With this one, I've been dilated to a 3 for a few weeks now and have had SO many contractions that have often kept me up most of the night... and I'm now only a week from my due date.  Can't wait to find out when this little lady will come!  In the meantime, I'm going to keep enjoying these super fun days with my crazy boys!

Christmas Stuff and Baby Stuff

Hope everyone had an awesome Christmas!  Ours was great, and fast.  December is flying by!

Our Christmas celebrations started when Grandma Kathy and Don came to visit the week before Christmas.  It was great hanging out with them and getting all the festivities started early.  They gave us a Kinect for Christmas, which is much harder to play when you're carrying around a bunch of extra baby weight.  ;-)  I'm super excited to get my use out if it though after the baby is born - soon enough!  She also gave Michael and Matthew these matching MDawg shirts.  Pretty hilarious.

And then my parents and little brother came the next week for Christmas!  Matthew played nonstop.... which means, so did Grandma and Papa.  ;-)

We also saw movies, (loved Les Mis, by the way!) shopped, ate good food, and just relaxed and hung out.  On Christmas Eve we went to the Mesa Temple to look at the lights and have hot chocolate.  I grew up going to the LA Temple every Christmas Eve to see the lights, so this is a tradition.  I must say, the Mesa Temple lights are pretty dang awesome.  However, it was SO crowded.  (It never is at the LA Temple).  It was still super fun, but sheesh. I guess the temple lights are a much bigger thing in AZ than they are in LA.

And of course Christmas morning was a blast.  Santa was good to us this year.

 Baby Girl wasn't left out!  :-)

I was pretty quick in getting all the Christmas decorations down because I really want to be at least SORT of ready/organized when Baby Girl comes, and I didn't want to have to worry about undecorating once she's here.  And guess what?  I'm full term (barely) and dilated to almost a 3 and 80% effaced.  Whoa!  I was barely dilated to a 2 when I started labor with Matthew so it really could be any day now.  Michael is hoping for a tax break baby.  ;-)  Me?  I'm all about her taking her sweet time and coming as far into January as she wants.  Haha.  I must admit, however, that I've finally starting "feeling it" about a week ago.  And by that, I mean that I feel humongous, it's getting hard to move around, and tiny feet have made my rib cage feel like a nightmare.  Sometimes I even sleep so poorly that I feel like I already have a newborn.  ;-)  But still, I can handle it for a while longer....  But since Michael would loooove for her to come before January, it'll be interesting to see how much he "casually suggests" that I lift heavy objects, join him and Matthew in a (super long) family walk, and play the Kinect.  Ha.

Anyway, most of the "getting ready for the baby" part is done, except for packing for the hospital, (which I'm planning on doing tonight or tomorrow) doing some cleaning, and figuring out a couple other small details.  I am getting really excited, but I also have SO much anxiety.  (What if my labor is SO fast and I don't make it to the hospital in time?  What if I forget something important?  How will Matthew do while I'm in the hospital?  What the heck do I do again while in labor?  Why do I seem to have forgotten everything I learned last time?  Am I really ready for 2 kids?)  I know everything will be fine, but it's seriously impossible for me not to worry... especially about Matthew.  He will be the perfect big brother, but it's still hard for me to know that his world is about to be turned upside-down... even though it's for the better.  I have already informed Michael that frequent Mother/Son dates are absolutely essential.  (And I don't think he'll have a problem starting Daddy/Daughter dates really early.... I have a feeling that this little lady is going to melt Michael's heart the second he lays eyes on her).

Baby Girl, we are so excited to meet you!  You are already so loved!  Can't wait to add another girl to this family!!!!!

And Matthew, I love you forever and ever to infinity and beyond!  Thanks for making me a mom and being the best little boy I could ever ask for.  I can't even begin to tell you how much fun you are.  You have such a good and kind heart and your little sister (and any other siblings that may come along in the future) are ridiculously lucky to have you as their big brother.

My Top 10 Favorite Christmas Movies

I am obsessed with Christmas movies.  Recently I was telling Michael all my favorites and decided to instead make a formal list of what I think are the best ones.  It was actually kind of hard to narrow it down to just 10, because there are just so many good ones, but here it is:

Oh, and these are NOT in perfect order, though I do believe that the top 5 should be somewhere in the top 5!

10.  The Polar Express 

So this movie almost didn't make my list, but I can't ignore the theme of this movie.  BELIEVE.  Could there be a better message at Christmas?

9.  The Santa Clause

So most people don't consider this movie one of the classics, but I happen to love it.  As a kid, I always got a kick out of watching Tim Allen unwillingly transform into Santa.  It still makes me smile whenever it's on.  As for the sequels?  Not nearly as good, though they do have a couple of good/funny moments in them.

8.  Miracle on 34th Street

I just saw this for the first time last night!  Crazy, huh?  Which is better, the old or the new?  I saw the new one and thought it was adorable, but I'm going to have to watch the old one too.  Anyway, it made my list because the line, "IN GOD WE TRUST" saved the day.  That makes me happy.  And I was so concerned about poor Santa.  I'm a believer.

7.  How The Grinch Stole Christmas

I didn't love the Jim Carey version, (just a bit too weird for me) but I absolutely adore the original, animated version.  I love Cindy Lou Who, and the poor little puppy with the antlers strapped to his head.

6.  A Charlie Brown Christmas

I've watched this every year for as long as I can remember.  I adore it.  And we have our own version of a Charlie Brown tree in our home.  It looks sad when we put it up, but once we give it a little love (decoration!) it looks much better.

5.  Home Alone

What kid didn't love this movie?  Fabulous, cheesy acting.  The hero is the best kind of troublemaker.  And I love the creative things he comes up with to defeat the bad guys.

4.  The Muppet Christmas Carol

I actually also really like the newer, kinda scary Christmas Carol movie because it's a very well-written book and the new movie includes many of the real lines from the book.  However, I think I like the muppet version the best.  It's just so dang cute.  And much more kid-friendly.  :-)  Anyway, I love the transformation of Mr. Scrooge.  Funny, though, how even though he goes through this amazing transformation, if someone is called a Scrooge, it is never, ever a good thing.  Haha.

3.  Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer

I think this was my very favorite Christmas movie as a kid.  Rudolph.  Clarice.  Hermey The Dentist.  The amazing Abominable Snowmonster, who turns out to be a sweet teddy bear once his teeth are removed.  And Yukon Cornelius.  All amazing characters.  (Although I always found Sam the Snowman to be a bit boring.  Just me?)  No other Rudolph movie has even come close to being this cute.  Can't wait until Matthew can enjoy it.  Maybe next year?

2.  It's A Wonderful Life

Maybe my dad will be so happy that this is in my top 5 that he'll forgive me for including "The Santa Clause" in the top 10.  :-)  Okay, I'll be the first to admit that it took YEARS for me to be able to get through this movie start to finish, but this really is one of the best movies of all time.  This man had all kinds of dreams to see the world, become rich, and really live his life.  And what does he learn?  That he is IS living his life, by working hard and having a family and sharing all those small, amazing moments with his wife, kids, and friends.  He was living the dream all along.  What a great message for all of us, especially at this time of year. Oh, and I absolutely adore Clarence.  He is so dang lovable!  So glad he earns his wings!!!

1.  Elf

I have never met someone who doesn't like this movie, and I wouldn't care to.  This movie could make anyone laugh.  Start to finish, it's hilarious, witty, and sweet.  I usually watch it at least twice every December.  There are soooo many good quotes from this movie, but I think my favorite is:

"You like sugar, don't you?"
"Does syrup have sugar in it?"
"Yes...."
"Then YES!"

Well, that's it!  Any movies I forgot?  Honorable mentions?  (such as A Christmas Story, Frosty The Snowman, etc....)  Movies that I included on this list that should NOT be on this list?  :-)

I think it's safe to say that there will be lots more movie-watching in this house this month.  I still need to watch a few of these, plus I'm not ashamed to admit that I kind of love the ABC Family Christmas movies too.  They are cheesy, and wonderful.  

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

One Last Road Trip

I hate long road trips, but I LOVE getting to the destination.  Vacations are awesome.  However, they get harder with kids, and I imagine we're not going to be up for road trips for a while after Baby Girl gets here.  So, we decided to take one last road trip (for a while) and go to LA for Thanksgiving.  It was a blast!  So glad we got to squeeze in one last vacation.

Remember how I said that traveling with kids is hard?  Well, I've only ever traveled with one kid.  My sister came down with her four kids, and one of them is only 2 weeks old!  That's bravery at its finest.  And guess what?  Her 2-week old (Sadie) is pretty much the cutest thing ever.  I held her as much as I could and I still don't feel like I got even close to enough time with her.  Every time I held her I would just think, "Oh my goodness, I want a baby girl SOOOOO bad!!!!!  Oh wait...."  :-)  But while having your own newborn is the best feeling in the whole world - let's be honest - it's also incredibly nice to hold someone else's newborn so that you can get your newborn fix without also dealing with recovery/lack of sleep/etc.

Love her.  Miss her.  (Miss my other nieces and nephews too!)

Thanksgiving dinner was delicious.  Last year, we let Matthew have a tiny bit of mashed potatoes.  It was his first taste of a "real" food.  This year, he got his own bowl and got to go crazy with the food.  He was a huge fan.

The next day my mom threw me and my sis a small baby shower.  I'm so thankful for people who are so nice and generous.  And of course, the food was awesome.

There was also lots of time for play.  Grandma and Papa have such fun toys.

We also went to the beach and it was SUCH a gorgeous day.  Absolutely perfect weather.  And the older Matthew gets, the more he loves it there.  He definitely has some CA blood running through those veins.

And now, time to really start getting ready for Christmas and this baby girl!!!  Both are coming up SO fast!  I'm horrified that I don't have my tree up yet - but that'll hopefully get done tonight or tomorrow night.  Yay Christmas!